The house is utterly quiet again, because Julio left today. He loved Wellington and had a great time, and so did I - I'll miss him. But having him here has, I feel, sort of shifted me along to another standing-place where I'm more able to cope wth my new state, even though I'm on my own again. I'm still not at all sure what the point is, but the feeling of pointlessness is diminishing, and I spend less time staring blankly out the window.
At the same time, I can't help grieving because having Julio here has also emphasised that the distance between Harvey and me is widening. It's as though we'd been travelling together for a long time and then he suddenly had to stop where he was, while I have to move on and away into new territory and new experiences he can't share, leaving him further and further behind.
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I do understand these feelings, that Harvey isn't coming on the journey with you now.
ReplyDeleteBut he can travel with you, in your heart and memory - this is true immortality. We live on within otrhers, as he now lives within you.
Alison x
You express the process so beautifully Anne, of travelling onward and away from the loved one. It's a poignant post, and I was touched by it.
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